Sonia Ruyts

notes on creativity, motherhood, and living a bold life

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This Moment :: Dessert Before Dinner

This Moment :: Dessert Before Dinner

{this moment} – A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. ~Soule Mama

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March 15, 2013Sonia Ruyts this moment, toddler

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Hello there!

Welcome! My name is Sonia and I am a writer, avid knitter, and queer mama of 2. Join me as I write about exploring my creative pursuits, reading, parenting, gardening, and whatever else strikes my fancy.

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ON RESISTANCE // “The more important a call or action is to our soul’s evolution, the more resistance we will feel toward pursuing it.” ~ Steven Pressfield In other words, the stronger the desire, the stronger the resistance. It is a shadow. . One of the hardest parts of writing isn’t the act of putting words on to the page. It’s showing up and sitting down and pushing through your resistance to do it. I don’t know about you, but I’m amazing at finding reasons not to write! . For the last two years I’ve been working to fit a regular writing practice into my life as a mama and small business owner. At first this looked like stolen moments here and there, nothing very regular. Then I got some great advice: pick a time to write and do it every day. 🤯 Don’t decide IF you’re going to write or not each day. Something else will always try to feel more important. . I made a commitment to spend time writing every weekday from 8:30-9:30, also known as the space between preschool drop off and work. Because I’d already set aside the time mentally (and even put it in my schedule), it was a lot harder to back out. Spending this time at the beginning of each day was revelatory! . Now that I no longer have my business, I have the opportunity to reevaluate my schedule and priorities. After trying a couple of different things, I’ve found that heading to my writing right after school drop off still works best for me! 📝 Knowing that I’ve given my creativity time first thing helps me move through the rest of my day with a lot more ease. Sure, sometimes I choose exercise or grocery shopping or resting at home instead, but as long as I’m clear it’s not resistance at work, it’s cool. . How do you fight resistance?

That time we met friends at the pumpkin patch and left with 93 pounds of gourd-geous-ness 😏🎃

I mean, how could I not? 🧡🍂💛

The desk is clear, the bulletin board, too. I’ve got an ambitious new project in mind, along with a new notebook and a container full of my favorite pens. It feels great to be back in this space after a couple of months away. I’m excited to be reentering the season of writing. The fact that it’s fall — my favorite season until spring — only adds to the excitement! 🍂📝🍁 What’s new for you this season?

This is the first summer since 2011 I will not be working. The first summer I don’t have to hustle, juggle, schedule all the days between the last day of school and the first. I anticipate it being the first summer that I won’t be feeling feelings of envy over pictures of sun kissed kids, berry picking, days at the pool, family camping trips, and time spent reading outside. In large part that will be because I hope to be doing those things with my own family! But also because I’ll be removing myself from this space so I can challenge myself to be present and gracious in my own life. 🐳 The last time I updated my iPhone I enabled the Screen Time tracker. Each week my phone sends a report showing how much time (and how) I’ve been on my phone. It was shocking. No tricks or limitations have really helped me change that usage. So I’m going cold turkey. I’m taking the summer off from social media. 🌊 I look forward to seeing what grows to fill those 2-3 hours per day 🙀I’ve been spending holding this device. What I notice. How my social interactions change. What I create. How I choose to document our lives. 🦀 I have loved this space for years and have made some real and true connections here. I wouldn’t trade that away. But increasingly I feel like social media is taking more than it is adding to my life. This was confirmed when I listened to Cal Newport of the book Digital Minimalism being interviewed on my friend @jessicamurnane’s podcast. Head over there and give it a listen if something hasn’t been feeling quite right for you, either. ☮️ Thank you for being a part of my story. All the best! 😙

P R I D E 🏳️‍🌈❤️👩‍👩‍👧‍👦 . I remember going to my first Pride event in the summer of 2002. It was a little parade in NYC, and I was awestruck. As a 20-something from rural Idaho, this was one of the first times I had seen a celebration of queerness. Floats of dancers blasting loud music, LGBTQ members of the NYPD, beautiful drag queens and more all had me jumping up and down with excitement. But the Dykes on Bikes brought unexpected tears to my eyes. Their power, their confidence, their ability to be themselves and own that word — that word which I had only experienced as a hurtful slur shouted across streets and parking lots or uttered under someone’s breath as they passed— it was a revelation. . Fast forward to 2019: going to Pride in Portland means just as much to me now as it did then. Pride is simultaneously a protest against hate and injustice and a beautiful celebration of queerness in all shapes, colors, and abilities. To take my children there (back in 2002 I didn’t believe we’d be able to have a family) and see so many families and rainbows and people being themselves in community is a beautiful thing. I want my children to know that no matter who they are they will be accepted and loved.

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