This is 40

This month I turn 40.

As this notable birthday approached, I kept waiting to feel some sort of feelings about it all. An impending and overwhelming sense of mortality, perhaps. Maybe a surge of youthful recklessness, an irresponsible spending spree, or the desire to become a yoga teacher. I was ready for anything.

Instead, I decided to close my business, learn about WWII, and start investing in higher quality clothing items, particularly those with elastic waistbands.

Not bad for a going over the hill journey.

As the big day got closer and closer, offers for parties and gatherings to celebrate came my way, but none of it felt right. I’ve never loved big celebrations where I’m the focus of attention. What I was craving was quite the opposite: Alone time. Quiet. Vast open space and a bed to cocoon in, alone.

Yes, a solo weekend away at the Oregon Coast is what I wanted for my birthday!

Luckily, my wife understands these introverted needs of mine and doesn’t take it personally. I’m certain this in one of the contributing factors to our 16 years together. That and our uncanny ability to get all of each other’s jokes, however dry or cryptic.

My weekend away arrived, and with it a flurry of excitement mixed with a bit of anxiety. Would this time away in fact be relaxing and rejuvenating, I wondered. Or would I feel unsettled, unsure of what to do when I got there, missing my family or feeling guilty for having this gift of time to myself?

I eagerly packed my hiking clothes, yoga clothes, bathing suit for the hotel hot tub, pajamas, slippers, a knitting project, two books and as many journals, tarot cards, colored pencils, markers, my DIY pedicure supplies, and enough toiletries to do skincare treatments for a gaggle of 30-somethings. I had no idea what I would end up doing all weekend, but I wanted to set myself up for some of my favorite pastimes.

The first few hours I was at the coast did feel unsettling. The possibility of doing anything I wanted felt daunting. With the absence of dependents or an outside schedule to guide me, I was literally unmoored. So I did what I usually do when uncertainty strikes: I walked.

I took to the beach and meandered over rocks and chunks of shell-studded sand. I peered into briny tide pools glistening with clusters of mussels and the pastel-colored tentacles of dozens of sea anemones. I watched wave after wave roll toward the shore and crash into the rocky coastline. I scanned the surface of the water for whale spouts. I took deep, unhurried mouthfuls of sea air and kept moving, one foot in front of the other. Eventually my shoulders relaxed and my mind stopped spiraling. By the time I headed back to my hotel, my head felt clear and open.

I could do whatever I wanted, But I didn’t have to do it all. Now and moving forward into the next decade of life.

Over the next 24 hours, I settled into an intuitive schedule of resting, eating, walking, reading, soaking, writing, and sleeping. Thoughts of the outside world mostly faded away and it was just me, listening to the waves.

I didn’t have any huge revelations or breakthroughs on my weekend away. But what I did experience felt far more powerful. I felt affirmed in my path and content with myself.

This is the true gift of turing 40.

Some Thoughts on Reading

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I’ve loved reading since I was a kid. I would read anything I could get my hands on, from The Babysitters Club and Sweet Valley High to Dean Koontz and Edgar Allen Poe. I loved the scholastic book catalog and trips to Waldenbooks at the mall where I would sit on the floor, surrounded by books until I was forced to leave. As a teen I discovered literature and poetry and soon I had a carload of books to pack up with every move in college and beyond. I always had a book with me, and would read any chance I got.

Then something shifted. My life as a mother, particularly in the baby days, didn’t leave me with much mental space for reading. If I was reading a book, it would take me a long time to get through it, and I would often finish it feeling meh. I had lost the ability or desire to lose myself in the story, fictional or not. This was the first time I realized that reading books is a skill, and spending time doing it is a choice.

So when my daughter was a toddler and life started to feel somewhat predictable again, I decided to return to books. I would make the time and try to rediscover my love of reading.

Setting a reading goal for myself felt like a fun way to stay motivated, so when January rolled around I resolved to read 12 books that year. This was before I was on Goodreads or keeping track in any sort of way, so I can’t recall what I read or how many books I read that year. But what I do know is this: my love of reading was rekindled and my ability to dive deep into a story was restored with each book.

Why I Read

For me, reading is a way to connect to myself and to humanity at large. I read to reaffirm what I already know, to discover new ways of understanding the world, to challenge my beliefs and privilege, to have adventures beyond the scope of my reality, to connect with the stories of other humans, to be entertained, to escape, and sometimes just to have fun.

When I read, I’m giving myself a gift, a little something that exists just for my own satisfaction. It’s not for or about anyone else. Reading connects me to my truest self, all the messy, complicated, romantic, intellectual, cynical, silly parts of me that maybe get set aside in my day to day life. To me, this is time well spent.

Making the Time

Last year I read an astonishing (to me) number of books. It was quadruple the amount of books I set out to read in my first reading challenge, and I had to ask: how did this happen?

Well, I decided to make the time.

First I looked at how I was spending my “leisure time” (quotes because as a working mom I didn’t feel like I had much time to spare). I quickly discovered there were pockets of time lost to social media, tv, and similar.

I almost always read before bed. This meant adjusting my bedtime so that I’m hitting the pillows before I’m actually ready to fall asleep. I also always read in the bathtub; it’s my favorite place to start a new book!

Another way I make time to read is by always having a book downloaded on my phone via the Kindle or Libby apps. Libby connects to your library card, and you can borrow ebooks and audiobooks alike. I’ve also started making sure I have an audio book downloaded – usually non-fiction – to listen to in the car or on walks. Pro tip: if I’m reading a longer print book, sometimes I will also borrow the ebook from the library. That way instead of losing 15 minutes to social media when I’m in a waiting room or early to school pick up, I can read my book.

Another shift: I gave myself permission to stop reading a book I didn’t love. My reading time is precious! I’m not going to squander it trying to get through a book that I’m not connecting with. Sometimes I put the book aside for another time; there are seasons and moments for books, and when the timing is off, it just doesn’t work.

some of my January/February books

My Reading Life Now

This year my goal is to read 50 books. I’m off to a strong start thanks to my February sabbatical. No job and a social media break have given me loads of time to read, and I’ve loved every moment of it. You can check out the books I’ve read so far this year on my Goodreads page.

A year or two ago, my friend Hannah shared that she was reading books via the Book of the Month Club. I was in another reading slump by then, now with two kids and a business in my life. I missed books, so this seemed like a great way to get excited about reading again. Plus we could talk about the books and trade!

BOTM highlights 5 books by contemporary authors each month, with a mix of genres and styles to choose from. It’s been a lot of fun discovering some new-to-me authors and genres. Hannah and I always text each other around the beginning of each month to compare thoughts on that month’s selections and share what we’re thinking of getting. We also chat and meet up regularly to swap books back and forth.

The March books for Book of the Month were just announced today. I’ve been excited for Daisy Jones & The Six and was thrilled to see it was included in the selections. If you’re interested, you can check out the selections here . 

I’m curious: do you identify as a reader? Why do you read? What’s your favorite book you’ve read in the past year?

Dear Sabrina

 

I have some exciting news to share!  I am now a contributor on the lovely and thoughtful blog, Dear Sabrina. 

When Jodi asked me to contribute to her blog, I was intrigued. It had been a while since I’d published anything to my own blog, a space that has evolved from a knitting blog to a personal blog and website. I felt somewhat apprehensive; what did I have to add there? Then she and I had some interesting conversations about possible content and suddenly I was brimming with new ideas!

It feels really, really good to be writing in a more personal way again. I used to spend a lot of my creative energy within my biz, writing copy for products, email newsletters, and captions for social media posts. To get to put a different kind of writing out in the world has me feeling a little vulnerable, but also really excited.

I am thrilled to bring some of the topics Jodi and I have been discussing in real life to this space. I look forward to joining the conversations Jodi has started on topics like parenting, friendship, books, and maybe even my own categories of melancholy.

My first post went up this week, a piece about authenticity and vulnerability in friendship. I do hope you’ll read it and let us know what you think!

Photo by Kyle Glenn on Unsplash

Life After Stash

It’s been nearly one month since I closed the doors of my business. One month since I let go of a dream I had spent the past 7 years building, growing and nurturing. It feels like a long time ago, and yet I also sometimes still drive to work on auto-pilot, catching myself as I look for parking.

What will I do next? I’ve gotten that question more times than I can count in the past couple of months. The short answer is this: I will take some time to be with my family, to be a mom and a wife instead of a harried entrepreneurial working mom who happens to have two kids and be married to that person over there.

While that’s true, it’s not the whole story.

The truth is, I’m exhausted.

The past 18 months have been so full of contradictory emotions and a million decisions about the business. On top of running the business itself and managing my daily life, I was struggling with feelings of failure, grief, and a profound sense that I’d let people down. You can head here to read a little bit more about my decision to close Stash.

Now that the business is gone, ostensibly the stress is too. While I do feel about one thousand pounds lighter, it also feels like I have a stress hangover. My monkey mind has been busy for years processing all I have to juggle; now that a few balls are out of rotation, my mind is still trying to juggle them. It’s been hard to relax.

In this life after Stash, I am craving hibernation, a blanket of quiet, and lots and lots of hot beverages. Some Netflix couldn’t hurt, either. (I just finished this and was mesmerized)

One of the ways I am seeking quiet in my life is by taking a social media break. This is something I do regularly; it’s a good practice for me to step away and live my life instead of thinking about how to share it. This time I am planning on taking all of February off of Facebook and Instagram. I have enough going on in my head that I don’t need to pour in the voices of other people, multiple times a day. 8 days in, and I feel more peaceful already.

Another way I am seeking quiet is by spending time in my new studio!  I am sharing space with good friend and jewelry designer Liz Grant. This is a space that I stumbled into, and as luck would have it, this has been the perfect landing space for me.

My new studio is quiet and filled with light. I have a desk and some plants and not much else. This is the place I have yearned for for years: the physical and intangible room to write. I plan on doing a lot of practicing in this space. And as much as I’d like to attach an outcome to this writing (there goes that brain again), I am simply committing to writing for the sake of writing. We’ll see where it all goes.

This is a time of transition, a time of rest and contemplation. A time to let go of expectations and just be quiet with myself. It’s uncomfortable; I want to know what’s next, of course. But this time is also a gift, one I intend to settle into and savor for as longs as it lasts.

I’m curious: how have you settled in to time between jobs or life after a big transition?

A Room of My Own: Why Creative Space Matters

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Sometimes it feels like my kids simply cannot keep their hands to themselves. They can’t help it, I know this. Powerful curiosity paired with a lack of impulse control means small children touch EVERYTHING. They want to feel the surface of a book. Tap the hard glass on a picture frame. Stroke the glossy leaves of a houseplant. Tap tap tap on the keys of the laptop.  Sift through the detritus in my nightstand drawer. You get the picture.

Much of this exploring is delightful to watch, and mostly harmless. But some of it grates on me, makes me feel violated in a way. Like each poke of a little finger into my brand new blush compact is a poke in my eye.

As a parent I try not to take my kids’ behavior too personally. I know and respect that they are their own people trying to make sense of the world just like the rest of us. Our children are given room to roam within the boundaries of our family rules, and it mostly goes okay.

Where I’m still struggling to find flexibility and ease is in claiming some personal physical space.


When we first moved into our house, my vision of each living space was so clear. We have a two-story home, and and the first floor has our living and dining rooms, kitchen, and a half-bath.

We also have a lovely extra room at the front of the house with double doors, a transom window above, and tons of natural light thanks to a large east-facing window. My daughter was a toddler when we moved in, and making this space a playroom was ideal. She could have a space to play and create and be messy. It was close to the main living areas, and having this space meant no toys in those living areas. I took great pleasure in designing the room. We shopped at Ikea and put together a desk and cubbies and hung picture wires to display her creations. It was perfect.

We have spent countless hours together over the years in this sweet room working with play dough, painting at the easel, building train tracks, stacking blocks, reading books. It was exactly what we needed for that phase of life.

Somewhere along the way, she started spending less time in the playroom and more time in her bedroom. She was getting older and wanted her own space. Then along came baby brother, and soon this room with its paint and markers and tiny lego pieces wasn’t as appealing a place to hang out. We slowly started moving things in and out of the room to make it work.

Soon we were spending less and less time in the playroom.

Meanwhile, I had started a podcast. I had started offering coaching to other creatives and was working from home more.  Our desk was tucked into a living space, and would naturally invite lots of curious little hands to its surfaces. A computer screen was damaged. Papers were crumpled. Nerves (mine) started to get frayed.

And then one day it dawned on me: What if we turned the playroom into an office?

It felt daring and exciting; the perfect solution. It also felt SELFISH as hell.

Who was I to take this sweet kid space away from the family in order to have space for me and my brain to think and create?  

And yet I couldn’t shake the dream.

At the beginning of the year I had made a vision board. It wasn’t until the piece was complete that I noticed a pattern. Desks. Modern chairs. Lots of invitations to write. My heart knew what I desired before my mind knew.  And once I realized that, I had to get my brain – and family – on board.

It was tough. There was resistance to this new arrangement from every side. My daughter cried. My wife bemoaned the loss of the kids’ artwork display.  I still felt guilty.

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In the end we compromised, and the room is now a shared creative space.

The original creative workspace has moved to one corner and holds our household art supplies. A rotating display of original creations hangs above. The toys are (mostly) gone, replaced by an adult desk and computer. A bookshelf relocated from another area of the house holds books, family photo albums, and a shelf of puzzles and quiet work for the kids. I hung my vision board and slowly added my treasures.

Creating this space was important both for my actual creative process but also in owning the importance of my work.  Having a physical space brings my ambitions out of my head and into the real world. Ultimately, this area represents the creative potential in all of us, from little hands to big hands.

Some of my favorite moments are when the kids and I are all in here quietly working. My daughter will be drawing or writing a story at her desk. I will be editing a podcast, writing a blog post, or daydreaming. My son will most likely be driving a car back and forth on the windowsill. There’s often a cat or dog asleep somewhere.

It’s these moments that I could choose to be annoyed that they’ve invaded “my space” or I could choose to be content with the arrangement. Full disclosure: there are days where I have to kick them out and close the door!  It’s okay. 

These years are short, and soon enough I will miss these busy little hands. In the meantime, I am so glad I staked my claim in one corner of a room to help my creative spirit. And, even though I thought I needed the room all to myself, it’s been a delight to do this work alongside my kids.

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The playroom before.

How to Gain Clarity and Move Toward Your Dreams

Do any of these phrases sound familiar?

  • I’d love to try to publish my knitting designs. 
  • I’ve always wanted to write a book.
  • I dream of moving to the beach/mountains/city and living a new life.

But …

  • I’m not good enough, don’t know enough, don’t have time right now.
  • I have kids, a job, a mortgage . . .
  • Who am I to sell my stuff, tell my story, follow a dream?

 

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I’ve been there. Hell, suppressing those negative inner voices is an almost daily task for me.  But I’ve gotten used to them, and I know they’re not telling me the truth.

So often we talk ourselves out of our dreams. We talk over and ignore them. We brush them off as silly or impractical. We delay them for some nebulous time in the future when we have more time or more money or better skills or more confidence.

I’m tired of putting dreams on hold. Secretly, most people are, but they don’t know what to do about it.

Gain Clarity and Move Toward Your Dreams

The first step in moving toward your dreams is acknowledging them. The second step is taking action.

Find your dreams.

Sometimes we’ve stuffed our juiciest, larger-than-life dreams deep down inside. We have responsibilities, after all!  Your job is to reconnect with your dreams. Here’s an ide:

Try meditating or taking a walk (no phones allowed) to clear your head. Take as long as you want for this step. Really let yourself imagine the possibilities or to shake off the limiting thoughts you’re so used to carrying. 

When you’re done, sit down with a journal and write for 5 minutes to the prompt I want or I dream about. Write down whatever comes to your head. Don’t judge or try to figure out practicalities. Let yourself dream. Big, small, whatever comes up for you, write it down.

Now look at what you wrote. What truths do you find there that you expected? What did you write that surprised you? 

Now comes the hard question: what are you going to do about it?

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Take one small step.

What is one thing you can do right now to move toward that dream? Schedule time to paint once a week, no matter what. Sign up for that writing class you’ve been dithering about. Email a friend who sells her handiwork to see if you can ask her some questions. Talk to your partner or somebody supportive about this dream and brainstorm what you could do.

Get support.

Going for your dreams can be scary—and exhilarating. It’s easy to fall back into old habits of shutting down the dream, throwing up your own roadblocks, or getting stuck in indecision.

A coach can help you see next step, call you on your bullshit, work with you on mindset issues. You still have to commit. You still have to do the work, but you’ve got somebody to hold you accountable, cheer you on, and give you fresh perspective.

Last year I had the bold idea to help other people realize their creative dreams. At the time I was running a brick and mortar business, parenting my two young kids, and living a full, sometimes stressful life. Who was I to add another big dream to my life?  I thought about putting this dream on hold until a better time.  But then I decided to just dive in. Live boldly.

I can help you move toward your creative dream.

So what is your crazy dream? The one you feel silly talking about or hide in your heart because you’re afraid others will think it’s silly and it’s really important to you. Even if you don’t talk about it.

What dream have you been ignoring or telling yourself you couldn’t really do that?

What if I told you that you could?

Find your dream. Act boldly. Live your dream.

I’d love to help.

Click here to learn more about my Creative Clarity Sessions

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Summer Bummer : Living Without All the Answers

“Are you having a good summer?” she asked with a hopeful smile.

I took a deep breath and felt just how tired I felt in my body.

I could see that she too was tired. A fellow mom and entrepreneur, she knows what it’s like to be juggling a very full life. And so I knew I could tell her the hard truth: No.

I was not having a good summer.

The intensity of that realization hit me like a tidal wave.

Summer is supposed to be a fun, carefree time, right?! I felt anything but carefree.

What was I doing wrong?

That afternoon on the way home from work, I cried. I had to pull over at a park and let the tears flow just to ease the tension and fear of all that had been going on.

Business had slowed down drastically in the spring at the shop. In an effort to cut down on some expenses, I was working more. I had been agonizing over some other business decisions for weeks, and I was having trouble turning off my brain. 

I am also launching my new side hustle: mentoring creatives. And hosting out of town family friends! With an already packed schedule, my self-care routine was out the window.  I was impatient with my children, I had hadn’t been making anything, and I hadn’t seen mu friends in weeks.

Which all adds up to less laid back summer fun with the family. I felt stretched thin and perpetually tired.

After being sick twice in under a month and suffering from insomnia, I decided it was time. Time to take matters into my own hands again instead of letting life run away with me. I’d like to say I created the opportunity for myself, but we happened to have plans to meet family for a weekend in the mountains. The timing couldn’t have been more perfect!

I decided to unplug from email and social media and say yes to all the fun opportunities that came my way that weekend.

We picnicked in the mountains. I waded in a lake with my kids. I cast on a new sweater project for fall. My sister, mom and I made a pie together. I went down a waterslide on a double inner tube with my wife. We let the kids eat all the treats and stay up past their bedtimes. And I did my best to clear my head of all things business related.

I came back not only refreshed, but a little bit lighter. I don’t have to have all the answers right now. I don’t know what my life and businesses will look like six months from now, and that’s okay.

Sometimes letting go of trying to hold all the pieces together and figure everything out opens you up to see new solutions or let the answer arrive in its own time.   As I get back into things it will be easy to slide back into worrying about what happens next.  But having taken this time to reset will help keep me moving forward with less stress.

For the rest of the summer, my decisions will be ruled by finding joy, being present with my kids, and reconnecting with myself. And just in case: I plan to have another unplugged weekend at the end of the summer!

Now I’m relieved to say that yes, I am having a good summer.

 

Are Priorities Holding You Back from the Life You Want?

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There was a time when I was very hard on myself for not living up to my own ideal of what motherhood should look like.

After years of infertility treatments, I finally got what I thought was my dream job: I was a stay-at-home mama! I kept up with my ideal almost obsessively. From cloth diapers and homemade play doh to long, media free afternoons of unstructured playtime, I had it all mapped out. And for a while, it worked. Sure, I lived for nap-time when I wasn’t needed so much and could tend to my own needs (a shower, please!). But eventually, about a year into the parenting gig, I realized I needed MORE.

I started a business when my daughter was just 20 months old. Writing a business plan, signing a lease, and ordering inventory with a toddler in tow was no easy feat! And I was still trying to hold myself to my previous standards. The ones I was able to achieve when I wasn’t starting a business.

It’s true what they say: you can have it all, but you can’t have it all at the same time.

I quickly realized that things would have to change; the way we were doing things just wasn’t sustainable. And I was being so hard on myself, giving to my business, my employees, my child, my partner, my friends. There was nothing left of me.

And then I had a second child and things got harder.

My priorities, the things that were supposed to drive the life I wanted, needed a major overhaul.

The days became so full I couldn’t keep up with washing poopy diapers. I was so tired that the thought of making dinner brought me to tears. There was no space in my mind for any more needs from anyone, let alone the needs of this ideal motherhood I wanted to have.

Because I couldn’t change the needs of my kids — they’re still quite small and their needs are totally age appropriate — I realized I had to change MY needs. My priorities had to shift into accomplishing what was truly important to me. I had to let go of unnecessary projects and busywork at the shop. I needed to stop fixating on all the things I used to enjoy that no longer served my day to day reality.

Sure, I used to make play clay; you can buy that. I used to use cloth diapers, but I chose more time reading with my kids over washing diapers. I had to let those things go because not living up to unrealistic expectations (my own) was breaking me down. I examined all of the things I felt I “should” be doing to decide which really mattered to me.

These days I choose to spend time on the things that resonate now. Baking. Practicing yoga. Picking up my kids from school each day. Focusing on the parts of work that make the biggest difference to my business and that light me up.  And if I want to make some play dough, I will because I want to, not because I feel like I should!

What are you doing because you feel like you should? Even if the should grew out of your own values and desires once? What are you doing because you once loved it that isn’t serving you right now? What, if you really stopped to think about it, is most important to do in your day?

Before you reflexively say “It’s all important,” let yourself admit what really resonates with you. It’s OK to stop doing something that was an important part of your life if it isn’t serving you right now. Priorities aren’t static. By taking time to re-examine them when things aren’t working, we can move closer to the life we really want to live.

What can you let go of? What can you embrace to move toward the bold life you dream of?

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be hard to see where you can make change. Sometimes the “shoulds” are so ingrained we think they are “musts.” That’s where I come in. I can help you get past your own blocks to dare to live the life you dream of (even if you hide that dream from yourself). It starts with clarity.

Learn more about Clarity Sessions and book yours today.

Live Your Bold, Creative Life: Intuition & an Ass Kicking


My alarm was set for 3:45 AM on Friday morning. But you know how it goes when your brain is both excited about the day to come and anxious that the body won’t wake up in time to make it happen. You either sleep terribly or you wake up super early. Luckily for me, I woke up just one minute before my alarm, and was able to let the anticipation of the weekend to come wash over me.

I was headed to the Radiance Retreat, a gathering of women that was part personal development, business seminar, and fitness training.  This last part was outside my comfort zone, but something told me I had to be there.

I was looking forward to disconnecting with my real life. Things had been rough on the sleep front with my littlest. The days toward the end of the school year had gotten so full and hectic. And then there was all the shit going on in my head.

You see, I have been contemplating a bold move of my own. A move that would result in me living a bigger, bolder, life and putting even more of myself out there in the world.

I want to help women connect with their own desires to live a bold, creative life.

I dream of doing this through one-on-one engagements where we can connect on a deeper level and get to the heart of your big dreams. We can move through your roadblocks, and I will help you get clear on the exact steps you need to take to get you moving in the direction of your dream.

My dream of becoming a Creative Coach feels audacious and exciting, and I love thinking about it! But this dream was also bringing up all my inner gremlins. I was stuck in a cycle of self-doubt that boils down to one thought:

Who am I to think I can help other people?

I’ve been wavering about whether or not to take the plunge for MONTHS. There are always a million excuses why you shouldn’t do the thing you’re dreaming of deep inside.

Here are some mindset roadblocks I’ve experienced:

  • I don’t have enough time.
  • I don’t have the money to invest.
  • I’m already doing so much.
  • No one wants to hear what I have to say.
  • There are already so many coaches out there doing it better than me.
  • What will happen to my existing business?

But the simple truth is it’s all bullshit. It’s all a way of holding yourself back, of playing small, of not living the life you desire.

These doubts and excuses create noise in your head, drowning out your inner voice. Your deeper intuition that knows exactly what you should do.

I’m just as guilty of falling into these traps as the next person. Ironically, I have a lot of tools for moving through those doubts and fears to get to the good stuff.

But in this case, I wasn’t able to use them on myself. I was allowing myself to fall victim to my tendency to people please, to put others’ needs and wants before my own, and to get so full of ideas and doubts that I couldn’t even hear my own voice anymore.


So back to this weekend…

I was in emotional pain when I arrived, desperately hoping to gain some clarity of purpose about all of this. If that didn’t happen, a couple of hours reading on the beach would do. I just needed a break from the cycle of relentless questioning I was in.

What I got from the experience was so much more.

Connection to new friends and time to connect with myself.

Acceptance as-is from other women

Motivation to stop wavering and move forward with swift and decisive action

Tears. There were tears within the first 30 minutes of this retreat. We cut through the surface and dove into why each of us was there and it got intense very quickly. Which was so good because it liberated us from the small talk and encouraged us all to connect openly and with integrity.

Laughter. When you’ve connected about the tough stuff in life, it feels really good to laugh with people.

Relaxation.  I gave myself permission to opt in only to those activities that really excited or challenged me. Looking at the schedule for the weekend ahead, I saw that the second afternoon included a 2.5 hour workout session. Instantly upon seeing that, my gut told me a big NO. Not because I was scared or nervous — I went to other exercise activities — but because I knew it would be the best opportunity to get some downtime at the beautiful beach. It was one of the best decisions I made all weekend! When I shared that I was choosing beach over barbells, it opened up that possibility for some other women who had been questioning.

A kick in the ass.  Jill Coleman is an incredible example of doing what you want with an unwavering certainty that what you have to offer is valuable and that you deserve success. Her business has evolved over time and she is now offering up her own brand of business coaching. I was riveted by her confident, unapologetic approach to business and the transformations hers has taken over the years..

At the end of her talk on the last day, she offered up a big challenge: Put up a buy button on your website by midnight that night. Cut through the excuses and doubts and just get it done.

So I did. What are you going to do?


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Introducing the Live Your Bold Creative Life Clarity Sessions

You have big dreams, but they tend to stay in the idea phase. You’re afraid to move forward. You don’t have the time or money right now. You don’t know what step to take.

I’ll help you:

  • Gain clarity on the big dream you can’t stop thinking about
  • Create an action plan to get you moving forward
  • Get unstuck and release some of the beliefs that have been holding you back

Putting something out into the world and offering yourself up to others who need what you have to offer is more important than holding on to your old beliefs. It’s bigger than your to-do list and your lack of tech knowledge, or the numbers in your bank account. The thing that you do or make or say has value beyond all the other self-doubt and negativity in your head.

I’m stepping out of my comfort zone and moving forward in my dreams. You can too. I hope you’ll join me on this journey. Click the link below to grab your spot and start living your dream life.

I’m ready to live bold!

From Uncertain to Confident: A 5-Minute Reframe

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I’ve been doing a lot of work around getting comfortable with being uncomfortable. With facing my fears and moving forward in spite of them.

One of my favorite tools to leverage the discomfort and get me out of the cycle of self-doubt is to do a Fear Dump. This powerful 5-minute exercise will take you from feeling uncertain to feeling more confident and powerful. I got this idea from my business coach Megan Flatt, and it works wonders!

Fear Dump Exercise

  • Set a timer for 5 minutes.
  • Write down all of your fears and uncertainties around a new idea.  Don’t censor or edit yourself, just let it ALL out!
  • At the end of 5 minutes, go through the list and ask yourself: Why is this statement NOT true?  I want you to literally cross out all the negative words in each sentence.  This act will instantly reframe the fear into a very powerful statement.

For example:

I’m afraid that I don’t have a unique message to share with people.

becomes

I have a unique message to share with people.

—–

I’m afraid people won’t want to buy what I make.

becomes

People want to buy what I make!

Powerful, right?!

This simple exercise can help you build confidence around a new idea, give power to the positive, and help banish the uncertainties and fears that have been holding you back.


What’s one uncertainty you’re living with right now?  I’d like to challenge you to do a Fear Dump and share one of your new power statements here.