At the Beach

Recently, after the cashmere dust of Sock Summit had settled a bit, my dear friend and I returned to my home for a little visit before she headed back east. Smartly, someone on her flight into Portland told her she simply had to see the Oregon Coast.  How could I deny her the wonder and pleasure of a first trip to the Pacific ocean?  We were so very lucky to have a warm, clear day in which to bask in the enormity of the water and explore the tiny bits of sand and search for agates and seashells.  It is such a beautiful, sacred place, and I was honored to show my friend this part of the world.

Do you have a special place in the world that refills your cup?

Grateful.

Wow, knitters and friends.  Thank you.  Thank you for all of your kind comments here, on Ravelry, Facebook, and in my email.  I am overwhelmed with your support and excitement!  It’s amazing how once you start sharing your dreams with the world, the path becomes more and more clear.  Slowly the whole idea starts to seem less scary and more plausible.  I remember feeling almost nauseous the first time I reached out and told someone what I was thinking of doing.  And each time I told someone, I felt a little more confident and energized until I was ready to shout it from the rooftops.  Which is effectively what I did last week, eh?!

 

It has been a busy couple of weeks, packed with family visitors, fun activities, good food, and time with friends. We took a trip to the beach on Friday, PB’s first since she’s been mobile, and it was a blast.  Cool and breezy weather didn’t stop us from setting up our chairs, walking along the beach, and playing in the sand.  Sadly, the cool and breezy weather (plus rain. lots of rain) have plagued us for a few days now, and I’m starting to feel a little stir crazy.

I did have to take an unplanned knitting break due to that telltale tingle and burn in the wrist and thumb joint after one to many marathon knitting sessions.  Fortunately, I have been able to pick up my needles again and am trying to work in 15-20 minute increments with plenty of breaks.  The hard part of that plan is that I am at the border on my Chadwick shawl, and with the end in sight I just want to keep knitting!

 

Momsomnia & Blog Envy

Last night, after having gotten up with a sick babe twice in under three hours, I couldn’t fall back to sleep.  This happens to me somewhat regularly: I get up in the night to nurse the little one, or to go to the bathroom, get a drink of water, etc., and then I can’t fall back asleep.  I lie there, perfectly awake, mind ablaze with myriad worries, to-dos, or on the good nights, ideas.  Meanwhile, the pitiful tired child in my brain is whining: why can’t I fall back to sleep?  I count the minutes I’ve been awake each time I roll over, willing myself to stop looking at the clock.  Finally I will either get up or turn on my iPod and listen to a knitting podcast.

After tossing and turning for a while I got up, had a bowl of Cheerios, did some blog reading and went back to bed where I thought about blog post ideas, and tossed and turned some more.  Looking at the clock, I see I’d already been awake an hour.  Sweetie was softly snoozing next to me, and I trembled with something like rage at her ability to sleep deeply almost the instant her head hits the pillow. I grabbed my iPod out of my dusty nightstand drawer, put in the earphones, and….nothing.  The battery was dead.  Shaking it did little to convince the thing to work, so here I am. It’s 2:58 am and I have Momsomnia.

During these sleepless nights, my brain often wanders to all things blog-related.  Sometimes I can soothe myself back to sleep thinking up blog posts, fantasizing over how to present my latest work-in-progress, or how to pull together a post out of some random photos I’ve taken.  Tonight I find myself wondering if some of the she-bloggers I enjoy reading ever get insomnia.  If they ever want to clobber their spouses for not waking up when the baby cries, or get frustrated after stepping on bits of dry cereal or cat yarf in her bare feet in the night.

Sometimes I can’t help but compare myself to some of these women and their lives as presented on their blogs.  My brain knows that what we see on each other’s blogs is a mere glimpse of our real lives.  Some of us never share the gritty realities of our lives, instead choosing to focus on the positive, naturally sunlit moments of our days.  Others can’t stop ranting about every last inane detail of their daily grind.  Somewhere in the middle is the truth of who we are.

I know none of us is perfect.

And yet sometimes I wish my life were more like someone else’s blog.  Don’t you?  You know the ones…

Sunlight streams in through spotless windows onto the freshly refinished hardwood floors original to the house while she expertly snaps photos of her children practicing their quadratic equations or learning how to read a sundial.  She never complains about poopy diapers (even the one that made her vomit last week when she was home alone with the babe and a stomach bug), spit up, the cat’s hairballs, in-laws tracking in mud onto recently vacuumed rugs, or that mysterious smell in the fridge.  She bakes her own bread every week, collects eggs from her heirloom chickens, has a cute haircut, has time to get said cute haircut, displays seasonal fresh flowers in the house (this time of year it’s a forced sprig of forsythia clipped on a nature walk with her children, an attempt to get them outside every day no matter what).  Her home is decorated in a chic mix of reupholstered flea market finds, diy sewing projects, and prints from her favorite sellers on etsy.  She’s always dressed nicely (no sweats for this one) and is never too tired to make a nutritious dinner.  She wouldn’t dare eat ice cream straight from the carton.  What else are those cute bowls from anthropologie for?

Get the picture?

My point in all of this is that I know no one is perfect, especially the  mythic she-blogger.  I am me, and in this space I share what I care to of myself.  It is by no means a complete picture.  Right now my eyes burn, the laptop is about out of juice, and I’m worried that as soon as I do fall asleep, my poor cough-riddled tot will wake again. Who wants to see a picture of that?

Don’t get me wrong: I love these blogs that so many talented writers, knitters, crafty mamas, photographers, cooks, gardeners, teachers, and artists take the time to share with us.  If I didn’t, I wouldn’t spend my time reading them.  There are just moments where I wish I could jump through my computer screen into their cozy living rooms and immaculate studios and stay awhile.  But after an hour or so, I would jump right back over into my life.  Because with all its imperfections, I love it.

At the end of the day, how do you let go of your daily worries?

Do you ever find yourself wishing you lived in someone else’s beautiful snapshots?

Got a cure for insomnia? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

 

{These photos were taken in Newport, OR on our post-holiday stay at the coast.  They are some of the first shots taken with my new camera, the Nikon D3100}

It’s All New to Me

Slowly but surely we are getting our bearings in this new home of ours.  There is a bit of the expected chaos, plenty of exploring our new community, and lots of breaks for playing with PB and trying out some of the new and yummy food options in town.  While I am enjoying all of the newness, it is starting to blur a little bit.  Too much new information can make me feel overloaded and unfocused, and I am dangerously close to that point right now.

I think a few more days of unpacking and nesting is what I need to start to feel more anchored.  I look forward to finding my way into a new routine, one that enables me the time to get back into blogging regularly.  The break has been good, but I have missed this!  So please hang in there and trust that I’ll be back knitting, taking photos, and writing about all the New very soon.  Until then, here are some lovely shots from our trip to the Oregon Coast over the weekend.

Cape Perpetua

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